phee-ohn-say

It appears that I'm getting married. Having asked, and receiving for an answer a somewhat breathless "yes, I will!" the ball is set in motion. And this is strange to me. Nice, but strange. In some regards I feel like (and my family and friends are emphasizing) that I'm joining the grownups, "Finally!" they add. And there's a certain curiosity I have about this "grownup" life, but there's also a certain sadness. This seriousness that so many grownups seem infected by, scares me. There seems to be little time for fun, my sense of humor is "inappropriate" (lots of what I do seems to be inappropriate in the grownup world), and I find myself already stepping on glass a lot.

I hope that this is just because I'm new to the world and haven't found my way to navigate it comfortably. But I feel like Peter Pan in a suit and tie -- kind of impressed in the mirror, but itching to rip it all off and jump in the lake. When do we get to skinny dip as grownups?

Let me not give the wrong impression: I love my partner, and am thrilled that she loves me. And am completely enamored by I'm just a bit nervous that we have different ideas of fun and fear that she may never appreciate some of the things about me that make me me. And I'd hate to change those things because I think they're great. So the thing to do, I suppose, is to take things slow (too late?) until she learns to appreciate them. This could be difficult, as she's already clamoring for a date.

No date has been set. Ah, the pains and discomforts of learning a new Discourse. Grownup-speak.